Too Many Cocks In The Hen House
by somewhataddicted
Summary: A fun one-shot written with The Lost Foodie. Based off a Twitter prompt. Bo, Lauren and Kenzi are on a case in small town America with the Morrigan. You'll never guess what kind of trouble they find themselves in after Evony's new boy toy turns them in on a little known law. They're not in Toronto anymore... Comedy ensues. M for language and content.
1. Chapter 1

**So, there was this crazy little twitter convo, started by 808 regarding a ridiculous, little known law in Arizona. Soldiergrrll and 808 thought it would be a fun prompt to explore so _TheLostFoodie_ and I collaborated to bring you this little one shot. If you haven't read her fics, get on it! She's very talented.**

**A big thanks to her for taking part. We can't believe how fast we wrote this, but apparently, it's an inspiring topic :) It was way too much fun and it was a pleasure to work with her.**

**Wait till you see what the girls have gotten themselves into this time...**

**_*Note- We own nothing. All characters belong to Prodigy and Lost Girl, but this is definitely one we would've loved to see on screen!_**

**"TOO MANY COCKS IN THE HEN HOUSE"**

"I seriously cannot fucking believe this is happening." Bo said through gritted teeth. Her hands pressed against the wall, feet spread wide beside the other three women as the officers ransacked the house looking for more contraband.

"You?" Lauren shook her head in disbelief. "Wait till this gets around the lab. Human doctor to the Fae caught in sex toy bust. That's not embarrassing at all." She dropped her head as her hands were cuffed behind her back.

"Oh please you two. What about my street cred? How's this look if I get caught in a sex ring with the ladies? You all may be down with the lady lurve, but I don't swing that way." Kenzi yelled over her shoulder as she was the first to be led out.

One by one, the women were placed in the back of the paddy wagon. It was hot. The summer heat made the vehicle feel like an incubator, but afforded the perfect excuse for Kenzi's flush of red cheeks due to utter embarrassment. She slid along the hard bench seat as Evony took a proud step inside the vehicle. She carefully sat down next to Kenzi, certain to cross her legs and smile at the officer helping Bo keep her balance as she stepped inside.

"Honey please, there's nothing men love more than the idea of a three way. You'll have them knocking your door down." Evony winked.

"Evony this is all your fault, as usual," Bo seethed as she sat opposite Kenzi.

"Sure, because all of them are mine. Pot calling the kettle black." She laughed.

"Ladies. Quiet." One of the male officers yelled at them as Lauren was the last to be loaded into the paddy wagon.

"No," Lauren whispered harshly, "it's your fault because you brought the overly enthusiastic rookie cop into the house."

Evony shrugged her shoulders with a complete lack of remorse. "Well doctor 'I-know -everything-about-everything', did you know that was a law? Because in my two thousand years I'd never heard of such a thing."

Lauren was quiet. She took pride in knowing even the most tedious details, yet she somehow overlooked that fun fact. A law banning the ownership of multiple sex toys? It was archaic at best and clearly not something Lauren would have even considered a possibility in the year 2014. Much less in the United States.

"Only humans would deny themselves pleasure. Prudes." Evony folded her arms and shook her head in disapproval of the weaker species.

"Hey!" Kenzi huffed. She puffed out her chest. The metal cuffs restricted her typical animated hands from conducting the passion to her spoken words. "I take offense to that. You know I'm all about fun. I put the fun in dysfunctional and I was twerking long before Miley Cyrus was even born, so don't be grouping us all together like we're some alien species, you big Fae-bot."

Bo intervened, ready to defend her girlfriend and her best friend. She had been furious at Evony for months. The current situation only added fuel to the proverbial fire. "Evony, it's your fault we're even in Arizona. It's been six months of hell in this hot ass state on this endless undercover mission."

Evony cocked her head and smirked. "Hell, you say? Ha! It sure didn't sound like hell coming from your bedroom last night."

Bo's eyes widened. She didn't think her late night rendezvous with Lauren was so loud that Evony heard it all the way on the other side of the spacious house they were sharing. She immediately looked to Kenzi for something, anything that would indicate Evony was just making a wild assumption.

"Sorry Bobo, but she has a point. It sounded more like heaven with all the 'Jesus's' and 'God's' being shouted for the greater part of two hours. I swear I need better headphones."

"Can we please stop talking about our sex life?! We have more important issues to consider, like how the hell we are going to get out of this!" Lauren's voice was strained and her point was valid.

The four women remained silent during the ride. The van finally came to a halt and seconds later, three large men opened the doors. A sudden breeze swept in from outside, cooling the flaring tempers inside the vehicle. Each woman was removed from the paddy wagon and escorted down the sidewalk in front of an old, worn building. The overabundance of decals on the brick building front advised they had arrived at the local police station. Through large double doors and down two hallways, all four women were placed in a large holding cell. An older officer removed their handcuffs individually from outside the locked cell before walking away and leaving them alone for the first time since the arrest.

Evony crinkled her nose as she moved to the front corner of the cell. "This place smells worse than that Shape shifter's dog breath."

"Dyson?" Kenzi asked. "Oh my god, Dyson! Yes, we need our free phone call. He can get us out of here!"

For once, Bo, Lauren and Evony were all in agreement when the three yelled "No!" in unison. Kenzi jumped at the response.

"Sheesh, okay fine! But when I get my one free lifeline, you best be sure I'm using phone a friend to get our asses out of here!"

"Call Tamsin. She'll know what to do."

Lauren's glare softened as she considered Evony's suggestion. Bo showed no preference for, or against, Tamsin.

Kenzi simply shrugged her shoulders as she sat on a flimsy bunk. "Fine. Tam Tam it is."

A few minutes later two male officers stepped in. One was the young cute officer that Evony had brought to the house. "Step back please."

Following the officer's orders, the ladies proceeded to the back of the cell while the gentlemen unlocked the cell door and entered. The older officer looked them over and held up an evidence bag. "Okay ladies. I'm going to ask you a few questions."

"Nothing happened officer," Bo responded. "We were in our home minding our own business until you guys busted into the place."

"That, young lady," he eyed her up and down, a look of disgust at her attire crossing his face. "is because we received a call from one of our officers reporting a felony offense."

"Felony? Oh god!" Lauren's head dropped down as she muttered, "This can't be happening."

Kenzi began to panic. "I had nothing to do with this officer, I swear. I just live here. I'm not even into the ladies. Ask around!"

The officer slipped on a latex glove and reached into the bag. He pulled out an extra-long blue dildo with a fist at the end. He barely held it by the edge of his fingers as he grimaced. He found the object to be a complete abomination.

"Who is the owner of this…reprehensible item?"

"Not me! Definitely not me, like I said, I'm innocent. I prefer mine au natural," Kenzi plead.

Evony's heels clicked on the hard floor with each of the three small steps she took toward the officer. "That would be mine." She soothed as she winked.

Kenzi's mouth dropped open in shock. "Holy sexcapades! What do you even do with that?"

"Well-"

"No." The goth threw her hands up and shook her head adamantly, hating that she even asked. "Never mind. I don't want to know."

The younger officer, who had been quiet until now, didn't take well that Evony was the owner of such an object.

"Evony? But….why would you need that if you had me?"

His plea sounded pathetic. Even the older officer rolled his eyes. She placed her hands on her hips and glared at the young man in his perfectly pressed uniform. "Size matters, sweetheart. Sorry to burst your bubble."

His jaw tightened as did his fists. Frustrated by such a callous insult, he puffed his chest out before turning around and throwing open the cell door. The metal bars rattled as he slammed it shut and stormed off. Evony smiled, rather pleased with causing such an obvious reaction.

"Let's continue shall we?" The remaining officer returned the dildo to the bag and retrieved another one. This was smaller, your standard issue pink strap on with a vibrator inside. "And this one?"

Bo sighed as she raised her hand like a well-disciplined student. "Mine."

Evony gasped, trying to repress her laughter. "So tame Bo. I'm disappointed."

Bo glared at her. "Oh trust me Evony, there is nothing tame about what Lauren and I…"

"Bo!" Lauren shouted at her fuming girlfriend. Her own frustrations were running high, high enough that she turned and directed her anger at the police officer. "Officer, we have rights! I demand to see the charges brought up against us. Immediately."

The officer looked surprised at her demands. He glanced at Bo. "She really isn't tame, is she?"

Lauren remained quiet despite her objection to his crude statement, but Bo couldn't help but smile, knowing that Lauren really wasn't tame in bed. Ever.

"Anyway, moving on…" He reached in the bag once more, pulling out a very sleek, long purple glass object. "And?"

Lauren's head fell back as she stared at the ceiling and sighed. "Mine."

"Doctor, I'm impressed." Evony smirked, eying the toy with a keen interest.

Kenzi jumped from the bunk to get a closer look, studying it inquisitively as the officer held it at arm's length. "Damn Hotpants. That has some serious ribbed action going on, I mean, if you're into that."

Bo looked over Kenzi's shoulder at the shiny glass object. "I've never seen that one Lauren." Bo's brow quirked up. A sexy smile pulled at her lips.

"It was going to be a surprise tonight." Lauren shrugged with a flirty smile and a glimmer of mischief in her eye. "Surprise?"

Bo shut her eyes tight to hide the blue flash. Just the thought of anything sex related with Lauren put her into overdrive, but her girlfriend buying a new toy? It took a great amount of focus to contain herself. "Mmm, I bet you did all the research on glass ones too, didn't you babe." It was more of a statement since Bo already knew the answer. She bit her lip and groaned as she squeezed her eyes even tighter.

"Definitely. At a thirty degree angle it stimulates your-"

"Excuse me," a deep voice intervened. "Can we get back to the problem at hand?"

"Sorry officer." Lauren replied and blushed.

Bo gave her a little wink that brought a bashful smile to the doctor's lips. The officer reached into the bag once again. He pulled out two items. One looked to be a remote control wrapped in a pair of red lace panties, and one was a small plug shaped object.

"Damn, this is like a game of 'guess what's in Santa's sack'. Looks like he only has a naughty list this year." Kenzi joked trying to lighten the mood, but no one laughed. Each one of these items increased the charges against them. The more evidence the police had, the worse the punishment could be.

"Oh, those are mine officer." Evony admitted. "I was really looking forward to having some fun with those tonight, too. Oh well. His loss."

The officer shook his head at her brazen attitude, but he wasn't done yet. Again, he reached in and slowly and started to reveal the next toy. As he lifted his hand, more and more of the toy became visible. It was as if he was extracting a never-ending length of silicone from the bag. The toy was large enough that the officer dropped the bag and held it object with both hands; fourteen inches from base to tip stood tall in the firm grip of a very pale police officer.

Wide eyes and open mouths graced the faces of Evony and Kenzi. The officer tilted his hands slightly, studying the toy and clearly making fast assumptions, or perhaps even his own comparisons. Four inches thick at the base, this toy exceeded the definition of extravagant. Tapered to a much smaller girth at the head, this one had clearly taken the majority of the room by surprise.

"Oh god." It was Lauren again. Her hands moved fast to cover her beet red face. She turned away, unable to face anyone in the room as yet another one of her possessions was now on display.

"Now, that one I know," Bo beamed as the memory came rushing back. She even stood a little taller, proud of how she and Lauren had used that toy in the most recent past.

"Holy Moby's Dick!" Kenzi exclaimed. Her expression was total shock.

Evony, on the other hand, smiled wide in appreciation of the object before them. "Well in all my years, I have never, ever…I stand corrected on my prude comment, doctor."

Bo flashed a smirk at Evony. "Jealous, Evony? You should be. It's a whale of…."

"Officer," Lauren interrupted. "Do we have to do it like this? I mean, can't we just look in the bag and tell you what's ours?" She was beyond embarrassed already and if the officers had done a thorough job they probably had two more rather interesting looking ones that belonged to her.

"None of them are mine." Kenzi plopped onto the bench, folding her arms and crossing her legs in defiance.

"I'm sure the officer has a reason to display each one of these. And besides, I'm enjoying this Doctor. Now I know how you keep the um..." she nearly forgot they were in the presence of human policemen, "Bo so interested."

"Shut it, Evony." Bo took two hard steps before calming herself as the officer moved towards her. "The sex is amazing, but I'm interested because I love her."

"Gods, you two are nauseating." The Morrigan examined her nails without a care in the world. "Whatever happened to a good old fashioned fuck?"

The succubus rolled her eyes and huffed, "You will never understa-"

"I can't do any more of this." The officer dropped his head and muttered to himself as he was let out of the cell. As he disappeared from sight, his voice could be heard booming through the adjoining room. "Someone else finish this. I'm through!"

It wasn't but a minute longer before another officer rounded the corner, this time pushing a cart with a box on top. And in that moment, when Lauren saw the edge of a light blue ribbon peeking out from under the lid, she knew the officers had been thorough.

"Step back please."

This officer was not as old as the one who bailed on his duty, nor as young as Evony's boy toy. He had a scruffy mustache and an expression that was void of any personal emotion. The ladies stepped back in the cell as he entered the space, bringing with him the cart and its contents.

"Oh, pa-lease do not tell me there is some sort of sex swing in that box," Kenzi blurted out.

Adjusting his latex gloves, the officer asked, "This box, does it also belong to you as well, doctor?"

Lauren merely shook her head and mentally disappeared from the room. Yes, it was hers. Until now, only Bo knew the contents, but that was about to change.

"State your name, ma'am."

"Doctor Lauren Lewis."

"And you recognize this box, correct?"

"Yes officer."

Bo moved to Lauren's side for support on what appeared to be a very embarrassing moment. "Lauren, you brought that to Arizona?!" Bo whispered.

"I had it shipped last week. You said you missed it and I had no idea how much longer we'd be away from home."

The officer lifted the lid of the box, more of the light blue ribbon cascading to the cart's surface. With both gloved hands, the officer shifted the ribbon aside to reveal a double ended dildo. He lifted it and held it in his open palms as he looked directly at Lauren.

"Is this your property as well, ma'am?"

She shook her head with a nonverbal "yes".

Evony threw her hands in the air. "Well great. At this rate we'll be sentenced to life in prison."

"Life?! In a women's prison?! God no! I need men in my life! You all can go to prison and play with your harem of Chapman's and Vause's. Go live out some Purple is the new Dildo fantasy without me. I'm innocent!"

"Kenzi, you are not making this any easier. Remember I'm your best friend and I do know about that one time you…"

"Lalalalala! No need to bring up the past, Bobo! Let's just focus on moving forward."

The officer returned the toy to the box and immediately lifted out the last of Lauren's sex toys.

"Well if that isn't the mother of all monuments."

"God, Lauren that was a gag gift. You still have it?!"

"Oh sure, that's what they all say!" Evony quipped.

"What? It's the Eiffel Tower! I can't just throw away a replica of the La Tour Eiffel. Did you know that in French it means "the iron lady?"

Kenzi busted out laughing. "Iron?!"

Lauren interjected. "It's not made of iron! It is 100% medical grade silicone!"

Within seconds, the booking officer appeared from around the corner, grabbing everyone's attention. "You each get one call. Who's first?"

The group immediately looked to Evony, who merely huffed at having to do yet another task on her own. "Very well. I will handle it."

"You better. It's all your fault."

Evony proceeded to the cell door and was escorted out. She followed the older officer down the hall, around the corner and passed a few detective's desks. Her usual grace and swagger was undeterred by the fact that she was currently a prisoner and well on her way to poor fitting, itchy clothing and barely edible food.

Arriving at a basic landline telephone, the officer glared at his prisoner. "Make it quick." The officer snapped.

She punched in the number to reach Tamsin and waited as it rang on the other end, her perfectly manicured nails tapping impatiently on the faded commercial gray painted wall.

_"Hello?"_

"It's about time you decided to answer the phone."

_"Morrigan? Where are you? I don't recognize this number?"_

She glanced over her shoulder to a police officer nearby. She smiled before turning her attention back to the phone call. "Yes, well it's a long story, but it ends with you getting down here pronto and fixing our little problem."

_"What kind of problem?"_

"That's none of your concern."

_"If you expect me to fix shit, I have to know what kind of shit I'm dealing with."_

"Fine."

Evony explained their predicament. She kept her voice low, attempting to keep her story from eavesdropping ears nearby. She only shared most of the key points with Tamsin, although each one of the details seemed just as unbelievable as the next. Evony frowned hard as Tamsin laughed on the other end of the line.

_"Oh my, this has to be the most awesome thing I've ever heard."_

Evony rolled her eyes as she tightened her grip on the receiver. "I'm glad you're amused. Now get your ass down here. Use my personal travel agent so I'm not sitting in this shit hole for days."

Tamsin was still laughing. _"Two dildo limit. You can't even make that shit up. And Doctor Lewis? Really? I would have never guessed."_

"It's always the silent types. Of course you know, you are sworn to silence. As your boss I will personally kill you for treason and deliver you as a snack to the underfae if you breathe a word of this to anyone."

_"Oh, believe me when I say that just me knowing is way more than enough."_

"If you're not here in twenty minutes I'll have that lovely head of hair of yours hanging over my fireplace."

_"Are you sure you don't want to put it in your night stand next to your…never mind. Relax. It will take me a few minutes to set things in motion, but I have a plan."_

"Well get to it. I don't have all day."

_"Actually, yeah you do." _Tamsin chuckled and hung up.

"Fucking Valkyrie."

Evony slammed the receiver on the phone cradle. She ran her hands over her clothes in an attempt to regain some decency with her appearance before being paraded back to the holding cell. She took a seat and crossed her legs elegantly, like she wasn't sitting in a jail cell but her office instead. "She'll be here soon."

Not a moment later a young woman in a proper white dress and a pair of white flats was led into the cell. She looked as if she dressed for Sunday church. The officer unlocked the cell door and led her in before securing the door closed and only removing her cuffs through the metal bars. She rubbed her wrists as she glanced at each of the four women already residing in the holding cell. Uncertain of their arrest circumstances, she quietly took a seat on a far bench near the back of the cell, almost cowering from those present.

Kenzi stared her up and down, trying to guess the reason for her arrest. She looked entirely too innocent to be in jail, so Kenzi immediately assumed it must be some white collar crime. The longer she stared at her, the more curiosity Kenzi had about this stranger. After a few moments of considering multiple possibilities, Kenzi decided to strike up a conversation with the woman. The young goth got up from the bunk she had been perched upon and slowly approached the stranger. She plopped down next to the stranger, making her cower further. "So blondie, what're ya in for?"

She hesitated, looking to Bo, Lauren and Evony, who were now all staring at her. "Umm, my church was protesting a rally. You?"

Kenzi replied, "This time? Its sex toys. A shit ton of them. The ladies over there love them. I'd say it's not a big deal but, wow, the one that the doctor owns, man, it is definitely a BIG deal." Kenzi held her hands out, roughly shoulder width apart.

The woman's eyes widened in surprise. She voiced a very quiet "Okay..." as she scooted further away from Kenzi.

Kenzi continued. "But not me. See, I love the wang, as in one that is not detachable. Yep, give me a good old solid six inches attached to a very hot man and I'm all over it. The doctor over there though, god, you should have seen how many play toys she owns! For starters…"

"Kenzi!" Lauren yelled, appalled at even more embarrassment now in the presence of a stranger.

Kenzi cocked her head and shrugged before whispering, "Don't worry. If you want to see them, I'm sure we can get one of those officers to do another round of show and tell for you."

The woman shook her head a fervent "no". "That's not necessary. I'm just gonna stay right over here now."

She shifted away from Kenzi, putting herself as close to the corner as possible and staring at the wall. Kenzi grimaced at the woman's rude behavior. She stood up and walked back to Bo, who was leaning on the cell bars near the door. "Man, what's her problem? Just trying to be friendly while we're stuck in the clink. What's with this town and their fear of a little, err..." Her eyes traveled over to the doctor. "Or not so little, dildo? It's like Footloose but with sex toys."

Bo shook her head. "I know. I know. It's okay Kenz." Bo wrapped her arm around her best friend and gave her a squeeze. "But this will all be over soon. No women's prison for you, although if we did end up there, you know I'd have your back."

Kenzi smiled and squeezed Bo in return. "I know. That's why you're my bestie. Though I gotta say, you'd have your work cut out for you. The ladies would be dying to get their hands on all this awesomeness."

Bo laughed. "I know they would."

Forty five minutes later, the group sat quietly in their cell, each staring off at nothing in particular. It was then that Tamsin walked rounded the corner and came to a stop next to the cell. She leaned her elbows on the rails and smiled wide.

"Well, well. I always hoped to see Bo behind bars. Evony, it suits you well too."

All four women stood up quickly, moving near the cell door. "Just get us the fuck out of here." Evony sneered.

The older officer took slower steps as he entered the room and walked next to Tamsin. He hiked up his sagging pants before he pointed at the four women on the opposite side of the cell bars. "So, are these the women you've been after?"

Tamsin smiled wide as she nodded in the affirmative. "Yup. All four of them. These are the women I've been after. They are a sick bunch, sir." She held back a laugh as the four of them crossed their arms and glared at her. "Been trying to catch them for a year. They've been running an underground sex ring back in Toronto. Caught one of their cohorts last week with a dozen of those damned toys. Charged them with possession and intent to distribute."

The officer's face contorted with disgust. "Sick. Can you believe they had about twenty of them among the four of them? And this one?" He pointed at Kenzi. "Almost had me believing she was an innocent bystander. Ha!"

Tamsin patted the officer's back in a congratulatory manner. "Well, I can assure you officer that they will be punished severely back in Canada. We don't tolerate that kind of behavior back home. I will make sure that you are all commended for your service."

He inhaled deeply and smiled, happy with the recognition. "Thank you. We appreciate that. Well, the paperwork is all finished. I will arrange for their transport. I do have one question though."

All the women perked up, patiently wondering what he could possibly ask.

Tamsin replied with a simple, "What?"

"How did you get here so fast?"

"Oh umm, I was down here following up a lead when headquarters called. I guess your bust came across their desk."

He placed his hands on his hips and once again nodded with amazement. "Wow, our news made it all the way up to Toronto?" The officer stood up taller as he puffed his chest out. His eyes shone bright with pride.

"Yup. Nice work. Now let's get this over with. I can't wait to get them home and grill the hell out of them."

The officer made a fist and tapped Tamsin on the shoulder like one of the good ole' boys. "You got it."

"Oh, and I need all the evidence boxed up and ready for transport."

The officer raised his hands, palms forward in surrender. "You can definitely have that. Our small town isn't into orgies. That's big city stuff."

**XXX**

**That evening back in Toronto**

"I told Tamsin to toss that stuff. I don't want any of them after those men put their grubby little hands all over them. Feels dirty." Lauren said as she walked next to her girlfriend on the sidewalk toward the crack shack.

"Agreed." Bo shivered, disgusted at the thought. "You know babe, there is one good thing that came out of all this." She draped her arms around her girlfriend's shoulders and pulled her closer.

"And what might that be, Bo?" The doctor smirked.

"We get to go shopping." She waggled her brows and flashed a sexy grin.

"I like your positive outlook." Lauren cooed as she leaned in and captured her girlfriend's lips in a heated kiss.

"Gross. Can't you even wait until we're through the door and away from me before you start sexing each other up again?"

Kenzi pushed the door open, set her bags down and walked into the kitchen. "What the Fae?"

Immediately spying a heaping pile of adult product magazines and free samples scattered across the kitchen table, Kenzi froze in her tracks.

Bo and Lauren dropped their things and quickly made their way to the stack. They fingered through the lot quickly, scanning catalogs, store sale coupons and even pre-sale notices. A few 'hmms' and 'ohhs' could be heard from the pair. Lauren held up a picture for Bo to see, making her eyes flash. She whispered something in the doctor's ear that made her blush and giggle.

Kenzi rolled her eyes and turned away as she stomped to her room. "For the love of the Fae and all that is holy! Remind me to thank Evony for those noise silencing headphones!"

Tamsin strolled in the front door, setting the last few bags down before heading over to the lovers who were oblivious to the Valkyrie.

"After tossing your precious, and I'd admit, impressive treasures, I figured you'd be anxious to get your Fifty Shades of Grey groove back on." She winked at Lauren then turned to Bo. "Later succubus."

Neither woman spoke as they watched Tamsin near the exit. Tamsin stopped and looked back over her shoulder. "There may be a surprise upstairs. I couldn't find blue, but I think you'll recognize the ribbon. Try not to sex each other to death." And with that she shut the door, leaving the couple alone.

Bo looked at Lauren in shock that quickly faded and shifted to excitement. She started to run for the bedroom. "Loser has to watch."

Lauren grabbed a hold of Bo's hand and yanked her back. "Baby, sex with you...there are no losers." She swept her into her arms and kissed the succubus deeply, passionately, making Bo's head spin. Carefully she released her hold as Bo stood there mesmerized, licking the lingering taste of the doctor from her lips.

Lauren took off for the bedroom, skipping steps two at a time until she reached the top. "Unless you're the last one there," she yelled.

Bo stood at the bottom of the stairs with her jaw hanging wide open. "I can't believe what a cheater my girlfriend is. You, Doctor Lewis, are so gonna pay. That item you just showed me in the magazine? I may not let you use it on me." Bo sulked as she shuffled her feet slowly. The race was already lost.

"Bo?"

"Yes?"

"Why are you still downstairs talking when I'm up here naked and in your favorite position?"

Her eyes flashed blue. Suddenly, Bo was completely done talking.

**_Fin_**

**XXX**

**We hope you enjoyed this one. We sure enjoyed writing it. As always, your reviews are appreciated, so if you liked it, leave us cookies!**


	2. Chapter 2

**Hello again! Foodie and I had a few ideas and thought it would be fun to add another chapter to this story. Who knows if there will be more, but we will see if you all like this one first. **

**Also, checkout the oneshot "Product Placement." Its hilarious and written by the talented Saraidglas. **

**Xxx**

**Eight Months Later**

**Crackshack**

"Where are we going again?" Lauren asked mindlessly without looking up from the computer screen.

"Luigi's Pizza, remember? You promised Kenzi yesterday after she complained that we kept her up all night with our, and I quote, sexathon."

The word "sexathon" echoed in Lauren's ears. A smile instantly formed on her face as Lauren recalled her playful and very enjoyable night home with Bo. Those fresh memories were almost enough to make her forget about promising that Luigi's Pizza visit.

"Oh yeah, I almost forgot." Knowing that Bo would instantly jump to conclusions, the Doctor quickly corrected, "The pizza, not the sexathon."

"No need to clarify. Like you would ever forget a sexathon with a succubus."

Lauren paused her keystrokes on the keyboard. She heard the confident yet cocky tone in Bo's voice and tried to suppress her appreciation of it. Instead, Lauren began typing again without every looking at Bo.

"Well, I do try to remember things like that," Lauren agreed, but had to get her own boast in there. After all, no one else could claim to make a succubus swoon. "Especially since you never forget a night with a human doctor who knows your anatomy better than any other living being. And you were quite loud in vocalizing that last night." While Lauren expected an immediate retort, she was surprised when Bo did not offer one.

There was no denying Lauren's words. No one could make Bo feel the things her doctor did and those feelings went much deeper than sex. Instead of answering, the succubus glanced around her room, taking in the barely there walls. "Hmmmm, I wish we could sound proof this room."

Lauren's eyes darted to the wall behind her computer. "Wait, what happened to her headphones?"

Bo leaned over Lauren from behind and rested her chin on the doctor's shoulder. She lowered her voice to but a whisper in Lauren's ear. "She claims that even noise cancelling headphones can't drown out the succu-screams."

Lauren shivered at Bo's low, husky voice and the memory of bringing her succubus to orgasm several times throughout the night.

"She also noted," Bo continued, "that you must still have a few tricks up your sleeve because she swears I shattered her vodka glass last night."

Lauren smirked, only then tearing her eyes away just long enough to look over her own shoulder and give Bo a wink. She pulled her right hand from the keyboard and gently trailed her fingertip over Bo's strong jawline. "Well, I have been researching the art of making a succubus scream."

Bo's sudden inhale was unexpected, but the quick flash of blue eyes was not. It was always Lauren that could get Bo to fire on all cylinders. The drop in tone of her voice, the smile that stretched across her face, or even just the simple act of a teasing touch was more than enough to trigger Bo.

The brunette took Lauren's hand in to her own before placing one gentle kiss to Lauren's wrist. "I will say that your research has been very accurate, and as long as I am your only test subject, then I say carry on Doctor."

The intensity between them escalated quickly, but Lauren's playful mood was still present, allowing the doctor to keep her composure and wit. "Hmmm, then I guess I will have to send the succubus at the lab home then."

Bo cocked her head slightly. She released Lauren's hand from her own and with her own playful tone she replied, "Not funny."

Lauren's smile grew. She shrugged her shoulders and suppressed a giggle at her own appreciation of her joke. "Actually, it's a little funny."

"Hey!" Kenzi yelled up the stairs. "You two better not be knockin' bits, we got pizza to eat!"

Lauren and Bo shook their heads in unison.

"Be right down Kenz," Bo yelled back. She glanced from the stairwell to Lauren. "You ready?"

Lauren nodded as she stood from the desk chair and stretched her arms high above her head. "Yeah. I could really go for some pizza tonight too…and maybe a little something hot for dessert later."

Bo raised her brow at Lauren's suggestion and glanced over the blonde with a hungry eye. "Mmmm, what kind of dessert? Leather or lace?"

Lauren narrowed her eyes as the devious smile curled her lip upward. "Oohhh, I like the way you think."

Bo slid her hands from Lauren's shoulders to the top of her shirt. She unthreaded the top button and spread the neckline a tad bit wider to place soft kisses along her collarbone. "Maybe," Bo mumbled between tastes of delicious, creamy skin. She paused and returned her attention to her lover's lips, staring at them with reverence as she purred, "We should stop at the store on the way home. You know which store I'm referring to."

The doctor moistened her lips in response and glanced to the stairwell only once before returning her gaze to Bo. "Kenzi would kill us. I may owe her pizza every night for the rest of the year." Bo's eyes sparkled with desire and mischief that excited Lauren to no end. She could never say no the woman she loved. "So yes, let's stop."

**XXX **

The nighttime air was cool and provided a welcome relief from the heated summer days in the city. Just like every other weekend, urban dwellers milled about the downtown sidewalks, populating every corner like it was mid-afternoon. The bars were in full swing and the restaurants were packed. Even specialty stores were open late to accommodate the fluctuating crowds.

Lauren walked at Bo's side; their fingers threaded together perfectly. They strolled hand in hand next to Kenzi, keeping a relaxed pace as they maneuvered down the sidewalk. With smiles on each of their faces, all three women had tremendously enjoyed their late night pizza run.

"Man that hit the spot!" Kenzi rubbed her belly with one hand while holding a large pizza box in her hand.

"Yet you needed another whole pizza to take home?" Lauren shook her head, always amazed at how the tiny girl managed to put away food.

"Yup. Midnight is just around the corner. Oh and pizza for breakfast covers all the major food groups."

Bo laughed at Kenzi's rationale. "Wait, is there a fruit group in there?"

"If so, then it would be my bottle of Merlot, Bobo."

Bo shook her head and laughed. She remained silent knowing that nothing she said would combat whatever Kenzi had in her mind. If Merlot for breakfast was part of her healthy diet, then who was Bo to advise otherwise?

Kenzi continued, "Pay attention to my eating habits, Bobo. You could learn a lot from me."

"She's right you know. A glass of wine provides an incredible amount of antioxidants and polyphenols."

Bo glared at Lauren, not recognizing any of the big words the doctor had offered.

"She means it's good for us! See, even a doctor agrees with me!" Kenzi replied.

The three women crossed the street and just as they reached the other side, sudden darkness surrounded them. The typical city street lights and storefront lights that illuminated the area all went dark. The absence of any light pulled Bo, Lauren and Kenzi to a complete stop as their eyes adjusted to the eerie darkness.

"What the…." Lauren whispered as she glanced around the street.

"Oh boy, looks like another roaming black out," Bo replied. "Let's get home. Not always the best idea to walk around these streets at night when there is no power."

Kenzi took one step closer to Bo, ensuring her safety by standing near the succubus.

"Seriously! If anyone messes with me and my pizza, I'll send a raging succubus after them! You got my back, Bobo?"

"A raging succubus? Really Kenz?"

"Well, it sounds more protective than Bo Dennis, brunette girlfriend to the doc."

"I can see tomorrow's headlines now: Entire city block left dead in wake of a massive chi suck to save pizza." Lauren laughed through her words.

Bo squeezed Lauren's hand and laughed with her.

"Ha ha," Kenzi quipped.

"Come on then," Bo nudged her bestie. "The sooner we get home, the less threat you'll have against losing the pizza."

Bo led Lauren and Kenzi toward the clubhouse. They passed the next block and still no sign of power anywhere nearby. One more block down and they came to a halt at the corner where the adult store, Vex's Toy Box, was situated. Despite its typical twenty-four hour open status, the familiar flashing neon lights in the window were dark just like every other storefront.

A sudden unease grew in the pit of Bo's stomach as she witnessed a mob of people pushing and shoving on the sidewalk immediately around the corner from where they stood. While individuals peppered the streets for several blocks, this particular area swelled to a larger crowd. The shoving seemed to get more erratic until the sound of glass shattering sent the nighttime crowd into a frenzy.

Bo struggled to make out the scene in the dark of night. "Wha—"

"OMG! The looting has begun bitches," Kenzi shouted, cutting off her friend. "Mama needs a new pair of boots." Without warning, Kenzi shoved the large pizza box into Lauren's hands and ran toward the mob.

"No Kenzi, wait!" Bo stared at Lauren. She could barely make out the silhouette of her girlfriend holding a bent box in her grip.

"Shit." Bo was pissed. She wanted to head home and avoid the trouble all together and now Kenzi just ran straight into the fire. "Dammit."

Lauren stared in the direction of the crowd as well, but the lack of light made it hard to recognize Kenzi from any more than just several paces away. "Go ahead and get her, Bo. I'll wait here."

"No! I'm not leaving you here. We stick together. We'll both go find Kenzi and her new pair of boots, then go home." Bo was adamant. There was no way she was leaving her girlfriend out here alone.

Lauren looked to the crowd once more. "Okay, but she better be getting me a nice pair too."

Bo smiled. "You and me both." Bo placed a gentle grip to Lauren's elbow, guiding her down the sidewalk toward the crowd in the dark night.

They sidestepped some of the troublemakers and kept their focus solely on listening for Kenzi's voice in the crowd. Perhaps they were too focused, for out of nowhere a pair of brawlers crashed into the brick wall in front of them. The sudden movement caused Lauren to stumble. Bo lost her grip and Lauren fell to the ground, but her balance and sturdy grip saved the pizza from becoming sidewalk trash. God forbid Kenzi lose her pizza. They'd never hear the end of it.

Bo wasn't as lucky. The men bounced off the wall fighting and fell toward her just as a crowd of people made their way through. One threw a chair through the front window of the nearby shop. Bo tried to untangle herself from the mob, but was shoved inside through the storefront windows as she called out for Lauren.

Lauren scrambled to her feet. Now having very little concern for Kenzi's pizza, the doctor threw the box aside. She brushed her palms over her shirt sleeves and scanned the area, focusing all her attention to locating Bo in the sea of silhouettes. "Bo? Bo! Where are you?"

"Lauren?!" Bo's voice was drowned out by the crashing of glass and shouting as the fervor of the crowd escalated.

Lauren stared in the direction from which Bo's voice came, but couldn't see a damned thing. She quickly pulled her phone from her pocket and hit the flashlight. Startled by a yank on her arm, Lauren cocked and pulled back the hand gripping the cellphone. "I have a weapon and I'm not afraid to use it!"

"Chill Doc! It's just me and I got goodies!" Kenzi purred with three pairs of expensive boots held tightly in her grasp. "And what weapon? You're gripping an iPhone."

Relieved to see Kenzi and not some random looter, Lauren lowered her arm. But she was quick to correct Kenzi's error. "Actually it's not an iPhone. I prefer Androids, thank you very much."

Kenzi tucked the stolen boots under her arm and shrugged. "Whatevs. Wait, where's Bo?"

Lauren pointed to the nearby building. "She was dragged inside with the crowd."

Kenzi sighed and shook her head as she made out the sign "Vex's Toy Box" in the front of the building. "Of course the succubus would get herself pulled into a sex shop. I'm sure she was all 'Oh no, I have to go…oh wait, dildos…' pfft."

Lauren held the phone up and directed the bright light at Kenzi. "Okay, you got your boots, so now we need to go get Bo. This rioting is getting worse." Lauren shifted the flashlight away from Kenzi and took three hard steps toward the pitch black entrance. She paused and looked back over her shoulder at Kenzi. "One of those pairs of boots better be mine."

Kenzi's mouth hung wide open. Even in the dark, Lauren saw her expression of surprise. "Geeze, okay fine you can BORROW one pair. Now let's go save Bo from death by sex toy."

"Not funny."

Kenzi walked forward and paused next to Lauren. "It kinda is. See, she's a succubus and sex is kinda their—"

"Kenzi, focus!" Lauren chided her. She really wasn't in the mood for her random quirkiness right now when the neighborhood was going to shit. She knew Bo could take care of herself, but who knew what was going on in all that darkness. It would be so easy for her to get overtaken. Thank goodness the lights were off though, because Kenzi was right about one thing; Bo was a succubus and if she was standing in the middle of a room full of adult toys, her attention might easily be swayed. That would make for even crazier newspaper headlines that could read, "Blackout massacre as succubus goes wild in sex shop."

The doctor laughed to herself as her thoughts also drifted to how the adult toy industry would surely love the input from a succubus, if humans knew such a being existed. Talk about marketing! _Succubus Approved_ could be stamped on Bo's favorites.

Lauren shook off the thought as the idea of "researching toys" with Bo made her ache in places she didn't need to be aching in right now. She needed the blood to be in her brain, not her crotch. She proceeded toward the shop entrance with Kenzi huddled nearby, protectively hugging her new boots while keeping alert. Neither woman could see much. Their vision was useless outside of the small stream of light from the Doctor's phone. There was so much darkness mixed with the echoes of shouting, fighting and even a distant moaning that sounded like sex that made both women shudder in disgust.

Every minute that they were stuck there made the Doctor's gut churn with the feeling that this night wouldn't end well. She just prayed it didn't include bodily injury.

Out of nowhere, Lauren was struck hard by a body and thrown forward. Her phone skittered across the floor out of reach as she crashed to the tiled floor. Kenzi squealed as she too was shoved, falling into a row of shelves that tumbled backward. She never lost grip of those boots though. Only after she regained her sense of direction did Kenzi set the boots down with care before reaching for the first thing she could find to defend herself with.

Armed with a nearby item, Kenzi jumped up yelling, "Let's get it on assholes!"

At that very moment, a reserve generator snapped on. The shop was lit with a faint, luminescent green glow. Lauren scrambled to her feet as her eyes fell upon Kenzi three feet away. The tiny woman was surrounded by two men; her hands tightly held a three foot long double ended dildo like a baseball bat. Even the Goth's eyes grew wide when she realized what she had blindly chosen as a weapon. "Umm, poor choice of words."

The two men laughed, but continued to close in on her. Kenzi tightened her grip and smiled. "Aw hell, I'm all for some kink. Who likes it rough?" She swung the impossibly long, thick toy with the force of Babe Ruth, catching both men across the chins and knocking them out cold.

"Yes! Take that bitches!" She jumped up and down before remembering what she was holding. She quickly threw it to the ground and shook out her hands with a disgusted expression on her face.

Lauren caught sight of the stream of light still pouring out of her phone across the floor. She quickly retrieved her phone before returning to Kenzi's side. Lauren offered a high five, which the girl enthusiastically returned. "Sweet swing slugger. The Blue Jays could use you."

"Please, the Blue Jays need nine of me."

Lauren smiled and agreed.

Kenzi tuned into the sound of arguing from all corners of the building. "So, where's our little blue-eyed Bo?"

The doctor shrugged, her lips pursing together in concern. The longer they were apart the more anxious she became. Hopefully Bo was okay. At least the generator gave them a bit of visibility now to aid in their search. "Hmm, I don't know. It's a big store, so let's get moving."

Kenzi retrieved the boots and tucked in tight behind the doctor. They walked through a long row of products and reached the end of the aisle when Lauren stopped short.

Kenzi bumped into the back of her and whispered, "What is it? Do you see her?"

"Hm? Oh no sorry, but they have a BOGO on edible body paint and ohhhh look-"

Lauren reached for a bargain bin item when Kenzi shoved her forward. "No and no! You are not looking at that stuff with me. Let's find your woman and go. You can steal some of that on the way out when I'm not near you."

Lauren began moving through another aisle, leaving behind the discount products she barely had time to look through. "No, I will not steal. I'm not going to stoop to that level."

"Really? But the boots I'm giving you are fine? I mean, I can leave them here."

"Well, a gift is a gift. And I thought I was only allowed to BORROW them," the Doctor snarked.

"Mhm, funny how the tide turns when it's a gift." Kenzi poked Lauren on the shoulder. "Keep moving Doc. And be careful! This place is filling up worse than The Dal on La Shoshain."

"I guess this city likes its sex toys, not that I'm complaining."

"Must be why everyone's so damn polite. They're not all hard up and horny," Kenzi joked.

"Actually," the Doctor's scientific mind kicked into gear. "There are plenty of studies that show correlations between the amount of sex and happiness due to the effect of—"

"Yeah, yeah, I'm sure it's riveting stuff Doc," Kenzi prodded her to keep moving while effectively refocusing her on the task at hand. "But we got a succubus to find."

"Right," Lauren agreed and picked up the pace.

Around another corner and still no sign of Bo, but Lauren spotted a large cluster of people near a far corner of the store.

"Well, I would've gone to the electronics store, but it seems sex toys are quite the hot commodity. Thank goodness we're not in Arizona anymore," she laughed uncomfortably. That was something Kenzi never wanted to relive.

"Bo!" Lauren called out.

"Over here!" Bo shouted over the sounds of the rowdy mob in the corner.

Glancing in the direction of Bo's voice, Lauren scanned the faces for her girlfriend, but couldn't see her anywhere. Hoping for a better angle to look for Bo, Lauren and Kenzi carefully sidestepped the bodies and maneuvered their way unscathed until they reached the outer edge of the rowdies. From there, Lauren spotted Bo. She was against the back wall trying to fight her way free from the masses, who were actually fighting over the display model of a life-size sex doll.

Distracted from their mission of helping Bo, Kenzi and Lauren both cast their own curious glances at the life size toy being pulled by all its limbs in multiple directions. Judging by the way the looters tugged it this way and that, the toy was certainly not a cheap plastic, blow up doll.

Lauren's curiosity got the best of her and she picked up the discarded empty box for the doll. She squinted in the low grade green light to read over the label.

"Double-D Love Doll?"

Kenzi grabbed the box with a free hand and tugged it closer for easier reading. "For the love of all love dolls! This thing is $900 bucks!"

Lauren pointed toward the smaller print on the side of the box. "Well it does appear to be made of a synthetic material made for durability and long lasting, um… love?"

"But fighting over the display model? That thing probably has more miles on it than Bo's canopy bed."

Bo glared at Kenzi and Lauren from across the crowd. "Hey! Can you two do a little less analyzing and help a girl out?"

"Right. Sorry Bobo."

Lauren threw the box to the floor and scanned the nearby displays. She grabbed Kenzi by the hand and tugged her three aisles over.

Kenz, leave the shoes. You can come back for them."

Without much option, Kenzi dropped the shoes as Lauren shoved several containers of lubricant into Kenzi's empty arms.

"Um…no offense Doc, but we can't really slip and slide our way into that brawl over the doll."

Lauren loaded her own arms up with the containers. "No, but we can slip and slid those looters on their asses and get Bo out of there."

Without hesitating, Lauren charged back to the edges of the looters. She flipped a cap open and squeezed the lube toward the feet and floor of the nearby fighting men. She tossed the empty container over her shoulder and repeated the process with another. Kenzi immediately followed suit, erupting in laughter as one man tumbled onto another, pinning him to the ground. No matter how hard they tried to stand up, the men continued to slide on the lube and collapse onto others.

"Hahaha, Bambi could walk better on ice, suckers!"

Kenzi squeezed the lube containers everywhere and one by one, the looters fell like dominoes. It cleared a path for Bo, who simply walked on top of the fallen men to cross the puddle of lube smeared everywhere.

Bo reached the duo, panting heavily when she was finally free from the mob. "Thank god. I couldn't see and I was stuck in the mob and the next thing I knew I was against the wall. Good thinking on the lube."

"That was all Doc. Clearly she knows how to use it."

"Well," Lauren laughed. "Thank goodness Kenzi is good with a dildo. You should have seen her take on two guys at once. Talk about a staff of righteousness." The doctor broke out laughing as Kenzi frowned and Bo looked on confused, but her lip tugged up in a smirk. "Are you trying to take over as clubhouse succubus?"

"God you two are so gross," Kenzi shook her head, but nudged Lauren's side. "Two points for that one Doc."

From out of nowhere, two men engaged in exchanging punches plowed into Kenzi. She dropped the boots and screamed as she fell into the corner. The fighting men stumbled away from her and crashed through a display rack.

Bo was pissed. She was sick of all this fighting and she was angry that they pushed Kenzi. "Hey! No one puts Kenzi in a corner!"

Bo grabbed one scrawny guy by his shirt collar. She tugged him away from the other guy and pulled hard enough to send him falling on his ass. The other man stared at her for a brief moment, assessing Bo before he approached her with a cocky strut. Clearly he didn't know who he was dealing with.

An arm's length away from Bo and the succubus grabbed a paddle from the rack directly next to her. Not a moment later, Bo swung hard, cracking the man in the side of the head and sending him sailing to the floor. He was still conscious, but moved slowly, cradling his head where the paddle connected with his skull. The other man had regained his footing and charged Bo once again.

Lauren ripped open a box from a nearby shelf. She took the contents and rushed behind the man still on the floor. Quickly the doctor grabbed his wrist and tugged it hard behind his back. He moaned in pain, but lacked the focus to fight back. Making a quick and familiar knot, Lauren tied the nylon restraints on one wrist before yanking his other arm and repeating the process.

Bo dropped the other man on the floor immediately next to the one Lauren had restrained. This second man, however, was completely unconscious.

"Nice work, babe." Lauren finished one last knot and smiled. The man slightly pulled against the restraint.

Kenzi reclaimed her three pairs of boots and stood next to Bo. "Sure that knot will hold, doc?"

Bo laughed. "Trust me Kenz, no one can get out of Lauren's knots. Not even a raging succubus tied to a canopy bed."

"La la la la! My virgin ears! Geez, you two are exhausting! Like cats in heat!"

Proud of her work, Lauren smirked and tied up the second man in a similar fashion. "No, I'd say a succubus in heat is definitely more exhausting. At least for me anyway."

The one man still conscious continued to struggle against his restraints. His failure to break free spewed forth frustration in the form of voiced obscenities.

Kenzi rolled her eyes. She grabbed a ball gag from the wall display and shoved it into his mouth. "Shut it, creeper!"

Cradling her boots once more, Kenzi sighed and stared at her friends. "Now, can we please get out of here?"

Bo took Lauren's hand in hers and nodded. "Yeah sure, Kenz. Hey Lauren, did you see the BOGO on body paint?"

"I did and I also passed a nice little—"

"No!" Kenzi screeched and started toward the front of the store, leaving behind a laughing Bo and Lauren.

Lauren leaned in and whispered, "There is a back room, you know."

"Gross. I may be a succubus, but I'm not trashy."

"No, you most certainly are not. Except that one time during that roll play I requested."

Bo smirked as the memory flooded her mind. "Oh, well doctor, are you asking for another roll play then?"

"Maybe when we are safely out of the city."

Bo raised a brow. "Sounds good to me."

Lauren and Bo carefully navigated toward the front of the store. They stayed alert for any more trouble, but most of the masses were still near the back of the store.

"So they now carry that that new wireless vibrator in stock."

"Which new one?" Bo asked.

"The one can be controlled from a phone app. For those nights when I'm at the lab late."

Bo's eyes widened and her signature smile immediately took form. "Ooh, maybe we should grab one."

Lauren winked and smiled proudly. "I already did. Just don't tell Kenzi. I'd never hear the end of it."

Bo snaked her arm around Lauren's waist. "Ohh I love it when you play bad doctor," Bo purred and kissed Lauren's neck. "Man if I had you alone in this store…"

Bo's eyes flashed a brilliant blue. Lauren pulled her into a delicious, mind melting, knee buckling kiss that stopped time. The black out, the adrenaline rush from fighting through a mob of looters, and aisles upon aisles of sex toys all combined to escalate the succubus's arousal. Bo's hands wandered down, grasping the Doctor's ass and drawing a growl from her.

Lauren was about to give in and break her own rule of no hanky panky in a public place when a wave of bright lights blinded her. She instantly broke off the kiss, shielding her eyes with one hand from the intensity after the long bout of relative darkness. Bo closed her eyes as well; the blues quickly returning to browns. Within seconds, sirens blazed from outside the store front. A loud speaker blared out, "Everyone hands up and against the wall. We have you surrounded."

"Oh shit, not again." Lauren mumbled and released her hold on Bo. "Why do we keep getting arrested with sex toys?"

Bo smirked and shrugged. Rather than try to make a run for it, Bo led Lauren to the nearby wall simply prepared to obey the demands of the police. Kenzi dropped the boots and kicked them under a display rack. She stood next to Bo, quickly pulling stolen items from every pocket, seam and sleeve she had.

"Wow Kenz…I thought you weren't into stores like this?" Bo asked as she placed both hands on the wall in front of her.

Kenzi's face flushed red. Busted.

A few men tried to escape behind them, but were quickly handled by the police. It wasn't for lack of trying though, but the lubricant still coating their shoes destroyed their ability to run. Bo couldn't help but laugh at the sight.

On the other hand, Lauren did not find much humor in any of this situation at all. "I am mortified that this is happening again."

"No talking over here!" An officer's voice boomed behind them, silencing the three from further conversation. Several minutes passed as the women stood spread eagle against the wall amid a line of men. The same uniformed officer approached them not to long after. He frisked Kenzi and then Bo, before moving to Lauren and repeating the process.

"What do we have here?" He extracted a small box from Lauren's pocket.

Lauren panicked. She completely forgot the app controlled bullet vibrator was in her pocket. "Shit," she muttered under her breath.

"Hmmm, seems we have a looter still holding loot."

Kenzi's jaw dropped. Bo's eyes widened, instantly knowing what the officer now held in his hands. She quickly moved to defend her girlfriend.

"Officer this is a big mistake. We were just…"

"Save it for the judge. You three are under arrest."

One by one, Kenzi, Bo and Lauren were cuffed. The officer stepped away momentarily, providing the women a minute in private. Bo looked over her shoulder to Lauren. "Well getting cuffed in a sex shop like this wasn't exactly what I had in mind."

Feeling defeated, Lauren rested her forehead against the wall. Her career was at stake again. Not just for getting wrapped up in a mob, but for looting. Still, Bo's comment pulled a small smile to her face. Getting cuffed like this wasn't what she had in mind either. No, she had much grander ideas for her first time in cuffs.

Unexpectedly, a familiar voice echoed behind them, instantly making them all cringe. Still it could be much worse. "Well, well, well. Lookie who is all decorated in handcuffs. And for looting a sex shop no less. Boy, the sheriff in Arizona would have you gals burned at the stake."

Tamsin cracked herself up. She bent over laughing, slapping her own leg as she tried to calm herself. If only Dyson was here to see this.

"Ha ha Tamsin. Can get your laughs later and get us out of this please," Bo begged.

Tamsin folded her arms across her chest. "Maybe." She paced slowly behind them, looking them up and down while trying to hold back further laughter. "But you all owe me. Again. And I expect the good shit this time, not that weak ass human beer you paid with last time."

"Fine. Top shelf only." Lauren conceded. She really didn't need this incident to develop further and Tamsin, as much as she hated to admit it, was her best hope at sweeping it all under the rug.

"Yeah Tammy, you know I don't belong here. Just a victim ya know," Kenzi laughed uncomfortably.

Tamsin walked over to Kenzi and leaned over her shoulder to whisper in her ear. "Sure, sure. That's why there are three pairs of boots under that display rack behind you, huh?"

Kenzi smiled sheepishly. Tamsin's smile grew wider as she stepped back and looked over the three once more. With confidence, Tamsin looked across the aisle to the new young deputy handling the round up. "Hey Mike, I got these three over here."

He nodded as he picked up the man tied up with a ball gag in his mouth and tied around his head. "Uh yeah, sure thing Tamsin. Thanks."

The three women let out a breath of relief that the Valkyrie had gotten them out of a pinch, even though they'd never live it down.

Tamsin tapped Bo's shoulder and pulled her away from the wall. Lauren and Kenzi followed as they were led out of the store toward her squad car. "Okay, let's get you guys outta here. The fun I'm going to have with this… but seriously, what am I gonna do with you guys? You can't keep getting arrested with sex toys."

Lauren and Bo murmured to themselves and Kenzi kept her head down. She couldn't believe she was caught in a situation like this with those two again. She was just thankful she wasn't actually arrested for it this time.

As the four women reached the last aisle of the store near the exit, a familiar face appeared from behind the curtained room.

"Evony?" Bo froze, Lauren stopping right beside her.

Tamsin and Kenzi halted as well.

Evony pushed aside the curtain and brushed her long curls over her shoulder. "Hello darlings." She glanced around the store, quickly seeing the disastrous scene and police everywhere. "What's with all the ruckus? Did someone let the humans off their leashes?

Kenzi and Lauren frowned at the disrespectful remark.

"Seriously," Tamsin asked with her hands on her hips. "You've been back there the entire time?"

"I knew I heard moaning," Kenzi cringed and shivered knowing now that she was listening to the Morrigan have sex in the back room of a sex toy shop.

"What can I say? You don't have to be a succubus to enjoy the pleasures in life. Isn't that right, doctor?" Evony ignored their disapproving looks and paused when she finally took in the sight of the trio in cuffs. "Well, I see you ladies finally got around to that threesome. That took longer than I thought, though I didn't figure the little one for restraints. Next time I hope you'll invite me and we'll have some real fun."

"Gross," Kenzi spat, her stomach turning at the thought.

"Never gonna happen Evony," Bo seethed, stepping in front of Lauren slightly as the Morrigan's eyes drifted down her girlfriend's body.

Evony cast a wink at Lauren, infuriating Bo even more as her succubus jealousy roared to life.

"Watch it Evony. I don't care if you're the Morrigan, I will beat your ass," Bo hissed.

Evony grinned, her perfectly sculpted brow rising in a manner that dared the succubus to try anything.

Tamsin put her palms forward in the air. "Ease up you two. Or I'll haul you both downtown and throw you in a cell for a few hours to cool off."

The Morrigan checked her manicured nails and soothed, "Prison sex can be wildly erotic. The bars, the confinement, the helplessness. The feel of the cold wall against your blazing hot skin when the leader of France is between your-"

"Tamsin," Lauren blurted out loud and uncontrollably, effectively ending the story and drawing all attention to her. She wanted to get out of this situation as quickly as possible. "Tamsin," her voice lowered to a normal range, "please just get us out of here. I'd like to go home now."

Evony took a long look at the destruction around them then adjusted her long, satin red dress. A young man looking worse for the wear staggered out from the back without making eye contact as the Morrigan ignored him and approached the group. "Since I know you three are too prudish to have enjoyed my suggestion, what exactly did you get into this time?"

The four women watched his walk of shame before Kenzi shook her head. "Oh no, don't group me with these sex fiends. I just wanted a pair of boots. Okay three pairs of boots, but still…"

"That's the girl! Right there! She shoved that ball gag in my mouth!" The man who indeed did have a ball gag shoved in his mouth by Kenzi was being led out of the store by another officer. Everyone looked at Kenzi as the man directed his rants toward her.

She sunk her head lower. "Uhhhh…"

Evony flashed a smile. "Well you know what they say, practice does make perfect."

Tamsin pulled open the front door. "Come on you three. Let's go. Before Evony pisses you all off and Bo chi sucks the entire room."

Bo shook her head. "I'm not chi sucking anybody today!"

Lauren cast Bo a smile as they stepped outside. She leaned in to her girlfriend and lowered her voice. "Not even me?"

Bo could not stop the blue flash that filled her eyes. Perhaps she would make one exception.

**XXX**

**Next Night- Crackshack**

"And so then, Tamsin got us out of the whole thing and once again and we avoided time in the big house." Kenzi stood in the middle of the living room, speaking with animated hands as she replayed the events from the blackout.

Dyson relaxed in the chair, laughing as he glanced to Bo and Lauren cuddled on the sofa. Bo pulled the light blanket further over her, sinking against Lauren while the doctor's face flushed red.

"Well at least I won't have a record as being a looter of a sex toy shop," Lauren hid her face in Bo's shoulder.

Bo giggled and ran her fingers soothingly through her girlfriend's hair. "True."

"Oy lovies, glad you had fun, but that blackout cost me big money ya know? My place was destroyed and the Double D was torn to bits," Vex sighed dramatically.

"Hey we didn't plan to go in there, so don't blame us," Bo retorted.

"Yeah, I didn't even get to keep my boots," Kenzi pouted.

Tamsin cleared her throat. "Or any of the other items." She grinned at Kenzi's expression. The one that pleaded "ix-nay on the oys-tay."

"The insurance claim is sure to be a nightmare. Especially because there was a massive amount of lube spilled on the floor," Vex announced.

"Lube? Hmm, we don't know anything about lube!" Kenzi quickly replied.

Lauren subtly picked up her phone and started tapping. Seconds later Bo jumped. Everyone in the room stared at her suspiciously, except Lauren who was still engrossed in her phone with a devious smile upon her face.

Bo's eyes narrowed and she adjusted herself against the low, but steady vibration that had settled in between her legs. "Sorry, just a little twitch," she covered.

Vex continued to talk about store damage as Bo leaned closer to Lauren. "You little minx," she whispered with a wide smile. "That thief training sure has come in handy."

"You haven't even seen the half of it yet." Lauren wraggled her brows.

"Can't wait, but question…" She pressed her lips to Lauren's ear. "How did I not know I was wearing this?" Bo wasn't complaining, but the one in the store had was definitely something she would know she had on.

The Doctor gave an innocent shrug. "I made a few adjustments of my own. Since I had the app, I made a few minor modifications and wove a thin electrode into the panties I suggested you wear this morning." Her grin slowly grew when she tapped the screen again.

Bo jumped once more, again drawing all attention to herself. "Sorry," she mumbled, her face slowly reddening. "Guess I'm a bit jumpy tonight." She squeezed her thighs, ignoring Lauren's devious smirk and sought a distraction. "Hey Kenz, why don't you put in that Sandra Bullock movie?"

Dyson groaned.

Tamsin rolled her eyes.

"Oh bullocks," Vex whined. "We need more cocks in this hen house. More testosterone to even out the estrogen from you ladies."

"Don't look at me," Tamsin shook her head. "I'd much rather be watching the Expendables or some blow'em up shit."

"See," Vex continued, "Its three to three. What's the tie breaker?"

Kenzi stood up and put the movie in. "The tie breaker is that you could have ten wangs in here and those two ladies would still have twice as many. So shut it and watch The Proposal. I know you love it."

"Nah, I do love that Betty White though. She's a Fae you know? Hilarious. I remember her in Shakespeare's plays."

"What?" Bo, Lauren and Kenzi all gasped in shock.

Vex nodded. "Oh yeah. That Betty's been around for ages. Literally. And boy could she handle a-"

Bo waved her hand wildly. "Stop! I don't wanna hear anything about the beloved Betty White. At least not at this very moment."

Vex shrugged his shoulders defensively. "What? I was gonna say she could handle that William. He was a prick for sure, and not the kind you want to be handlin', if ya catch my drift."

"Do we really need to talk about Betty White's sex life?" Dyson asked.

"Agreed," Tamsin added. "And after the paperwork I had to go through to clear these three of all charges, I'm done talking about sex and sex toys and sex toy shops for this lifetime."

"Sounds like a certain Valkyrie needs a little somethin' somethin' in her life," Kenzi teased.

Tamsin tossed a smartass grin across the room. "The only thing I need is for you three to stop getting arrested with sex toys."

"We hear you loud and clear Tamsin," Lauren added. "No more public displays with sex toys. Ever."

"Somehow I doubt that," Tamsin replied.

"Promise," Lauren replied.

Tamsin smirked. "Yeah, well don't break that promise. First one of you to make a public display of anything sex related will owe me a year of drinks at The Dal."

Bo could barely focus on the conversation. Her mind was lost to the sensation buzzing through her body and without any ability to stop it, Bo twitched again.

Naturally, everyone noticed.

"What the Fae Bobo? Are you short circuiting or something?"

Lauren could not contain the smile on her face, but did manage to hold back her giggle. Bo squeezed her eyes shut tight, but the vibrations stimulating her were far too great. Her eyes flew open, blazing blue and there was nothing she could do to stop it.

"Lauren, what did you do?" Dyson growled, no sooner asking the question before his wolf senses kicked in and he knew it was time to call it an early night.

Kenzi's eyes widened. She didn't need wolf-like senses. She'd seen that look before and immediately started heading for the door. "Holy Mount Saint Helen's! She's about to blow!"

"What?" Tamsin and Vex asked in unison, looking on in confusion as Dyson and Kenzi flew past them. After another quick glance at Bo and her blazing blues, Tamsin grabbed Vex by the arm, yanked him from the chair and hauled ass two steps behind the others.

In the matter of seconds, Dyson, Tamsin, Vex and Kenzi had scattered out the front door. Tamsin yelled something about cashing in on that tab immediately as the door closed shut behind her.

Bo formed both hands into tight fists, desperately trying to hold the succubus at bay until she was certain her friends were out of the house.

Lauren watched her friends disappear from the house, laughing at the speed they barreled out the door. Her laugh was silenced quickly though as Bo pounced and pressed a searing kiss to her lips. Lauren dropped her phone to the floor as she wrapped her arms around Bo, her own arousal escalating quickly to match the brunette's.

Just as Kenzi suspected, it wasn't long before the succubus erupted. And it wasn't long after that when Lauren led a still very hungry succubus to their bedroom where Bo found out the vibrating underwear wasn't the only new toy her girlfriend picked up last night.

**THE END!**

**XXX**

**No, TheLostFoodie and I do not condone rioting, looting or stealing, but we do whole-heartedly support Doccubus shenanigans. We hope you enjoyed our little 2-shot collab and if you're holding this in your hands instead of reading it on ffnet, then congrats! You're our winner! (Leslie and Doris)**

**We had a blast writing this and hope that you have just as much fun reading it. Thank you for all your support of our stories. If you want to read more of this fic, let us hear about it. **

**Faemily Forever!**

**SW and TheLostFoodie**


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